Crazy times

Is Mercury in retrograde?

I've been sad for days and days.

People and relationships are coming apart all around me. Heartache, heartbreak, tears, fears and futures up in the air. I wish we could all just get along and intuitively know how to make it all work.

Although I know it's great when it's great, and it's worth it when we give our all to love and a good relationship, I am somehow feeling most fortunate to be single and *way, way* happy.

It all leaves me shaking my head and thinking about:

flip flops.

You know, those silly little rubber semi-slippers?

I have seen people wearing them in the most unseemly places. Their feet have to be cold. It's fall, for Pete's sake!

Shopping, concerts, church, reality TV shows, undoubtedly job interviews.

I have no idea when they caught on, but I have a feeling they started in California. Or maybe Hawaii. Or one of the warm weather Pacific Island nations - where they are part of the culture.

Maybe their feet feel free. Aired out.

Me, I find that little thing that sticks between your big and second toes irritating. They get too much sand on my feet when I walk on a beach - and slaps sand against my legs and all over the place with the flip and the flop of every step.

I prefer walking on a beach barefoot. If Brittany is reading this, she always sees that word as "bear foot" and laughs hysterically.

Likewise, "barefeet" becomes "bear feet."

I feel like I'm in a Seinfeld episode when she does that. I'm Seinfeld, of course. She's Elaine.

Anyway, I find it incredibly odd when I see people who live in cool and cold climates wear flip flops.

And it's not as if I walk around like Sherlock Holmes looking at people's feet with a large magnifying glass.

It's the sound.

Filp. Flop. Flip. Flop. That's a normal cadence. There's also the flipflopflipflopflipflop. Or the flipflop flip .. That's what I heard last time I was in Costco. That's a shopper shopping flipflopflip sound.

Today has been a fantastic day. Pampered, spoiled, celebrated, and self-indulged.

It's my birthday.

Cards! I love hilarious birthday cards. Here's one from my brother: cute picture of an older dog ... and it says ... "You're not getting slower, the squirrels are getting faster."

And from JB: A cat is laughing hysterically, saying, "In cat years you'd be a hundred and seventy-"

Hmmm. Any that do NOT refer to age?

Ah! Here's one: "Tired of getting those disgusting birthday cards that make fun of ageing? That ridicule anyone over 40?" You bet! OK, turn the page and it says.. "Yep. I guess the sense of humor is the first to go..."

Yeah. Funny.

Moving on to the gifts. Wonder what's in this box? I shake it ... nope, can't tell. I try not to go to wondering if someone got me something *expensive.* I try. But I know the person who gave it to me has *money.*

Oh, heck, I'll just open-

Oh. My. Gosh.

It's freezing out there now! Who would give me ... flip flops!?

(Maybe I should wear them to my opulent fancy French restaurant birthday dinner.)