Sing, dance and celebrate an icon

Last Saturday I had the honor and enjoyed myself immensely MC'ing and singing throughout the evening to celebrate the 60th birthday of my nationally renowned singing teacher and coach Nedra Gaskill!

The joint was jumping, the place was packed with well-wishers, most of whom were singers, who shared their talents throughout the evening.

More, Nedra's sis Lois flew in from California to get down with all of us show bizzers.

















She had a terrific time watching all of us perform. That's her on the right with Nedra and her granddaughter.

The fantastic dinner was catered by Nedra's son-in-law, a chef, so we scarfed magnificent large mushrooms stuffed with crab, caesar salad, pasta, salmon and stuffed chicken breast and many more delicacies.

I sang three songs: the touching "Don't Worry," a country hit written by Marty Robbins, "Little Girls," from the Broadway smash "Annie," which I hammed up completely in costume with a whiskey flask. Co-starring with me were Nedra's fantastic granddaughters!

I ended with "You Raise Me Up," which I sang to Nedra on everyone's behalf because she raises us all to be more than we can be!

Groups and individuals performed all four hours I was there, and were still going strong as I left!

Folk, opera, pop, alternative, gospel, country, Broadway and other genres were represented throughout the evening. As well as tons of laughter and a spirit I think most of us wish our nation had at this time. Music is not only the equalizer among humans, it's a a genuine uniter.

There's nothing like hearing a room full of singers sweetly harmonizing to such touching selections as "The Circle Game," or blowing the roof off the room with the rousing gospel crowd pleaser, "I'll Fly Away." The acoustics were brilliant.

Non-singing guests had as good a time as those of us who sang our hearts out. Meanwhile, if you've ever wanted to sing, write music, play an instrument or express yourself tunefully in some way, Nedra reminded us of k.d. lang's quote: "Don't die with music inside you."

An increasingly insular world?

Oh. My. Goodness.

For a screenplay I'm writing, one of the characters listens to a PLD (personal listening device - in his case iPod), so I got myself a refurbished iPod on ebay, and my world. Is. Rocked.

As much as I love music and to listen to Stephanie Miller's podcasts (I'm at boot camp while she's on these days), I am totally ensconced in my private cocoon of music and merriment.

It has been a pain in the derriere getting all the iTunes software and programming set up, switching the music format from Windows music player (some songs do not reformat from WMP to iTunes, sadly) and trying to keep the iPod from downloading a bazillion episodes of the "Stephcast" with the wrong episode dates, and directing them to the wrong category ("album") so I'd recommend you drop by your local Apple store *first,* before tackling this on your own if you are even slightly computer challenged.

I'm going there this weekend to get the quirks out of my new PLD BFF.

Of course Apple folks want us sad little PC users to switch over to the hip, kewl, wow! and now! MAC anyway, so I think they make it just frustrating enough to consider it.

The sound quality is amazing. Fantastic. A friend is wiring his new house so that he can plug his iPod into his sound system and all the house speakers will play his favorite songfest programmed in it.

I have 237 songs programmed, an audio Sherlock Holmes book and some Stephcasts which fills about half of my little 2G memory. I'm as happy as a little canary who didn't pass the physical qualifying me to work in the coal mines.

But.

Here's the but.

I'm so thrilled listening to my music, it's difficult to interrupt my ecstasy. I'm reluctant to listen to people or the news or --

I play it while I'm driving - which I realize is not a good idea because I can't hear anything else in or outside the car - unlike the old Walkman, whose padded earphones allowed other noises to be heard. [Edited to note: um, good thinking, CP. I discovered listening to PLD's while driving is .. how do you say .. illegal.]

And of course it means I'm not listening to any radio stations. Surely *they* are not becoming obsolete?

Speaking of which, podding reminds me of when I worked in radio. I was news director and morning anchor at four different popular stations in the Seattle area. Music stations. Pop, rock, alternative songs. Which we'd crank up to decibels that made our sound proof rooms shudder. Our bodies were imbued with the music.

When we didn't do it to the room, we'd crank up the music in our professional mega-headphones, drilling our eardrums with MUSIC!

Because of my news work, I had to limit my exposure to these experiences, my hearing remains quite remarkable. My hearing becomes near dog-sensitive when I lie still - when I get a massage, the soothing music volume is too low for the masseuse to hear, but it's just right for me.

Unfortunately, I knew a lot of disc jockeys and musicians whose hearing was so severely harmed by doing this, they literally became either near-deaf or actually lost all their hearing.

Because of their hearing loss, they couldn't crank the music up loudly enough in their hot massive headphones to hear what they were playing, but we could hear the music pouring out of their sound-proof headgear across the room.

Maybe they just felt sound vibrations like Beethoven did when he went deaf.

My heart ached for them. Imaging loving music so much you want to work with it all the time. And these men and women knew music. And artists. And musical history. And instruments.

Then being cut off from that beloved sound except in memory, and ultimately from their jobs -- they kept screaming into the microphone because they couldn't hear themselves speak.

I find myself cranking my iPod as high as the "good old days," then remembering the folks who lost their hearing because they cranked, and try to keep blasting to a minimum.

Then I think of all the kids I see wearing iPods everywhere and wonder what their worlds are like. Are they cranking? Are they they happy in their insular pod worlds?

They're insulated by their music - not all sorts of music, but just the stuff they like. It's called "narrow-casting," contrasting with the idea of "broad-casting" all sorts of things to general audiences.

I'm fortunate because, as Phoebe Snow sang, "There ain't no music I can't use." I listen to *everything.* I enjoy every musical genre except songs with misogynist and homophobic lyrics.
That's good because as a film director I need to have an extremely expansive awareness and understanding of music, because each film has it's own musical character.

I'm currently working on a screenplay to be made that involves Chinese characters, so knowledge of a wide range of international music is crucial.

And I shuffle.

That means my music is scrambled up when it plays so I don't only listen to one artist forever unless I want to repeat the piece a bazillion times, which I'm also known to do.

As I say, when I'm podding, I am happy to have no human interaction except that of the singers or musicians or audio book or a radio show played at a time I can listen. That's my little pod world, and it pleases me.

I can see that limiting my pod time is in my future because I could have these little ear pieces stuck in my canals all the time, singing along, dancing like a crazy woman and be happy as a little clam escaping chowder duty.

Yes, I know the pods also download TV shows and youTube and all, but heaven help me if I got distracted with that. I am, however, going to buy episodes of 30 Rock on iTunes.

Now performing "Man in a Coffin":

1923-2007

Neither rain nor sleet nor snow ..

Meet Jesse.

He's my mail carrier.

My mail box is a small walk away. Down the long driveway is no big deal when I'm healthy, but when I went through a year and a half of chemo and radiation to kick breast cancer to the curb? It felt like a marathon.

Jesse keeps tabs on his route residents and found out from my neighbors that I was ill, so he started bringing my mail to my door. Like, nearly every day. I received packages from all over the world - a wonderful international online group to which I belonged, The Chalupas, among others, were sending me hats from all over the world because chemo was costing me hair.

Actually, I didn't lose it all the way so many do, but just enough that I looked better in a cap than coiffed.

I still have days here and there that I'm a little under the weather - they come less often. Jesse continues to deliver larger packages to my door, checking up on me to make sure I'm OK.

One thing about Jesse - no matter how miserable the weather, the day or his life might be, he always greets me with that terrific, unfailing smile. I'm sure there were days when I looked like Edvard Munch's painting The Scream, but never felt like it because of that smile.

I know there are lots of complaints about the US Postal Service, and when Jesse has substitutes I have a few myself. I receive letters to other addresses, *packages* to other addresses, late deliveries, etc. Overstuffed mailbox.

Fortunately this doesn't happen often.

Christmas time I give Jesse something *I* would love to receive, and it's the least I can do for someone who watches out for me and all his residents so conscientiously.

Thanks so much for being such a wonderful person - and the world's BEST mail carrier, Jesse!

Wow! What luck!

My next movieScope magazine interview - which I get to do next week - is with one of the world's most brilliant, special, beautiful and wickedly talented actresses, Samantha Morton.

The British Oscar-nominated thespian's credits are legion since she started as a child actor; her work is considered the finest and audiences show up to see anything she's in on the big and little screen.

My best mate in Manchester, England, a TV critic, says he will show up at any theater or watch the telly any time of the day or night she can be seen.

Most recently she lit up television sets all over the UK and on HBO in the US with her memorable performance as Myra Hyndley in the feature length film Longford.

She has a number of upcoming films to be released, including Expired, Control, The Golden Age - she plays Mary Queen of Scots, Mister Lonely - in which she plays Marilyn Monroe, and Synecdoche, New York. I wonder what she's done in her "spare" time?

All but Synecdoche, New York are scheduled for release this year, which means that she should have at least a couple roles that would attract Oscar buzz.

Not a stitch of "Hollywood" about her - Samantha Morton's all about being a real person who just happens to blow everyone away who sees her perform on the big or little screen, and is obviously a great actor with whom to work. And she's worked with - and continues to work with - the best.

I've got to come up with some spectacular questions, since she is all about the art and craft, the joy of doing what she loves, living a down to earth life with friends and family and enjoying every moment of it!

A desperate, deceitful president talks at us

Last night George Bush misrepresented the state of the horrific military battles he foisted on our patriotic soldiers, sailors, marines and airmen six years ago in Iraq.

He has lied to us from the beginning about our reason to be there and continues to lie about the state of the "war." A war never declared by congress, so it has to be Bush's War.

Fighting "terrorists" in Iraq has only emboldened them to spread their hateful destruction in more nations and in more and more cunning ways. Why should they stay in Iraq when the Iraqis are fighting the US there?

Young Muslim adults have been radicalized in the US, Europe, the UK and other nations because of the US policies in Iraq.

To "convince" Sunnis to flip on Al Qaeda wasn't difficult - it's already been happening for months because Sunnis don't like Al Qaeda. With Al Qaeda it's "my way or the highway," and the majority of tribes and populations don't like being pushed around like that. They use Al Qaeda to help them fight an enemy then tell them to beat it.

The fact that the US also gave considerable amounts of money to Sunnis to hasten their separation from Al Qaeda helped. But all that "progress" we heard about the Sunnis making in Iraq sort of flew in the face of those who had been bragging about it when one of their pro-US leaders was blown to bits in front of his own home - which had a tank and other extreme protective measures to assure his "safety."

The Bush administration's hand-picking Shiite leaders to "head" the faux Iraq "government" only made things worse (the reason the Sunnis withdrew from the faux Iraq "government" - um, they don't get along with Shiites in case you haven't heard).

The only real cheerleaders in this mess are the folks at Haliburton who are making more money than you and I can imagine, trying to sort of re-build at least some of what has been destroyed -- only to have it blown up again and again.

But they cry all the way to the offshore banks counting US tax money they're paid because they use FOREIGN workers from Indonesia and other nations who work on the very cheap - cheating Iraqis out of jobs. But hey, what does Haliburton care? People? Who gives a damn. Profits - oh, yeah.

Not to mention the billions of US dollars spent for private armies like Blackwater to fight in Iraq on our behalf, mercenaries who are being paid many times over what our soldiers receive for the same job.

Did you hear that there is now a *bullet shortage* in the US for law enforcement agencies because of the need for so many in Iraq?

And don't forget all our US tax-paid for weapons that were stolen by the terrorists to the tune of 6-8 billion US tax dollars - meaning our own weapons are killing our soldiers because of yet another inept, incompetent move by the US.

It boggles the mind when I see politicians actually saying they believe that fighting the terrorists in Iraq makes for a safer world. Seriously, are they on crack?

Fighting in Iraq from the first day of our incursion and subsequent occupation makes for an increasingly destabilized world, costing more good American and ally lives, striking not just in the Middle East but in other nations as well.

I heard recently that West Point cadets are leaving the academy in numbers unheard of because they don't want any part of a military that is forced to do what George Bush orders them to do.

The bottom line in this God-awful bloody mess is that George Bush has no strategy. He does not know how to gain peace or pull our soldiers out of harm's way or solve this horrific problem given his supposed religious fervor and fantasy about "freeing" Iraqis who must settle scores among themselves they have been fighting for eons. More innocent lives? What does he care as long as he gets his way. My way or the highway is his creed.

Split the country into three areas? Kurds, Shiites and Sunnis? It's at least leaning toward a discussion of a solution. George Bush won't hear of it.

There is not, and there never has been in the history of humankind, a victory over "insurgent" enemies. Because they are not identifiable. They are not cohesive. They are not uniformed. They are not trained to fight like our soldiers - they make up their own rules. They are not a government. They are not an army. And they don't rely on one leader like Osama bin Laden or George Bush for their marching orders.

They are motivated by fear and hatred of their identifiable, uniformed enemies and become incredibly resourceful and resilient in their goal to destroy them.

Remember this is the way George Washington and the revolutionary war was won against the British and mercenaries.

Here's what I shake my head at - and hinted at in a recent blog.

The terrorists have already defeated George Bush. Their goal was to incite fear - which the President used to his advantage year after year to get congress to provide more money for his "war" that has only turned out to be a failed idea and bloodbath and the world knows it.

Terrorists seek to destabilize economies. George Bush has fallen for it hook, line and sinker. Not only has he borrowed massive billions of dollars from China and sunk us into extraordinary debt to get his way, but the Iraq oil that he claimed would pay for the war isn't - and won't ... until the US "controls" the country and has easy access to it. That is not going to happen because the enemies of the US there keep messing up the oil output with destructive attacks.

All this as the Iraqis who were going to greet us as heroes and saviors (remember?) hate our crummy guts because they have no jobs, water, electricity, sewage, education, infrastructures and the slightest degree of safety. Independent poll after poll report that the Iraqis want the US to LEAVE.

More, many Iraqi "police" and "soldiers" supposedly supporting the US turn out to .. well, NOT support the US when they turn on us and kill more US soldiers. These acts can't be predicted because they're wearing uniforms we provide them to identify them as allies.

This is a little disjointed, but good grief. There is so much more information from reliable sources that report factually George Bush did not have the slightest concern for understanding the culture, politics, economy, tribal feuds, religions or people of Iraq before he invaded.

And now he does not want to take responsibility for solving the problem he got us into. Like any un-recovered addict, he wants to blame others, have others take care of him and bail him out of trouble. If he can keep "playing this" (Dead Certain) war until the new president takes over and figures how to clean up his mess, he will be happy and consider himself successful.

More, in Robert Draper's book, Bush says he plans to hit the speaking circuit and make a lot of cash from his "leadership experiences" after he leaves his throne.

Any trained soldier will tell you: the *first* plan of an attack ... is how to exit that attack. Shame on our military leaders for not insisting on that to begin with.

I do believe that George Bush will be - and should be - tried in the international court for breaking the Nuremberg Principles of crimes against humanity. The torture of prisoners (when other techniques have been found to be so much more effective), invading a sovereign nation which was in fact never a threat to the US, its borders or people (United Nations inspectors reported this before the invasion), the horrific outcomes of invading Iraq that were predicted not only by critics but by our own National Intelligence Estimates that he cavalierly ignored, the bogus reasons he has had for "staying the course" costing not only American lives but hundreds of thousands of Iraqi lives and US taxpayers hundreds of billions of dollars.

The personal devastation to families suffering from Bush's ego-driven war is monumental.

And by extension, he is responsible for the lives of hundreds who have died in the US over the past several years because of Bush's failed and incompetent priorities. Money intended to shore up the levees in New Orleans went to Iraq, for example.

I pray for those people who continue to support this guy - and for his soul, because he has so much blood on his hands, he is swimming in it.

I'd prefer to stop writing about this in my blogs - I have so many good things happening in my life and so much inspiration and "how to's" to share.

But until those in Bush's incestuous administration stop lying to us, manipulating us to believe that what we see with our own eyes is not real ("Brownie's doing a heck of a job!"), I feel I must. I hope it makes a difference for you.

It's even heartbreaking to have so many weak people in our government who cannot seem to have the spine, wit or knowledge to stop this guy. He's already wrecked the Judicial and Executive Branches of our government as well as paralyzed the Legislative Branch.

There are no more checks and balances .. it's just us, paying for the checks he keeps signing without a shred of knowledge about what he is doing or humanity; without caring for our form of government or citizens, or even understanding the hell he has created.

Perhaps the most important question here is why did the rest of the world seem to know that this is what George Bush would do and all those people who voted for him did not? I guess the combination of an unquestioning and propagandizing media, a shell-shocked nation from 9-11 and a good dose of ignorant citizens who would rather focus on non-governmental non-issues like gay marriage would have to be the answer.

A report from fitness boot camp!

After my first week at the Seattle Weight Loss Boot Camp I'm thrilled to report that it's tough, it's challenging, and it's for those of us who want to get down and dirty (um, literally as I discovered) and get fit as the proverbial fiddle.

Our "Drill Instructor" turns out to be a knowledgeable, caring, nurturing and demanding coach, Kimae Dolan. She understands the physical and nutritional sides of being healthy and fit, and knows how to work with cancer survivors like me who have undergone extensive chemotherapy and radiation.

Fortunately for me, she is not humor-challenged and appreciates those of us who enjoy hard work! I love to sing (OK, this may come to a vote, I understand..) and encourage others as I push myself as much as I can - or have been instructed to.

There are some terrific women in my group. All ages, races and body types. Of the three morning groups she coaches, ours is the smallest - between 8 and 9 of us depending on the day.

We do everything outside because as studies have found, that is the fastest way to lose fat. Walking the uneven terrain, dealing with a variety of temperatures and humidity, it all adds up to more of a physical challenge than a floored room with a comfortable temperature.

That's not to say those cushy conditions are ineffective - just that being outside consumes more calories!

Walking and running up trails and hills, working with weights, doing lots of exercises - familiar and new - all add up to me feeling pretty doggone great today. I'm already lighter, and eating more carefully because I don't want to undo and regain what I've worked hard to lose!

Sleep is very important - we have to get rest or we'll get sick because of the demands being made on our bodies. I've been unbelievably good about getting to bed early since the alarm goes off before dawn to line up on time to hit the trail.

Each boot camp series runs for four weeks - meeting every morning, Monday through Thursday.

I think two elements make it even more successful for me: first, knowing that someone is expecting me (as I look forward to seeing the great women I've met), and second, being coached by someone who not only cares about her clients but is extremely knowledgeable using a holistic approach to nutrition and approaches to specific, individual physiological challenges that need attention to become optimally physically fit.

Of course, if I were the slightest bit competitive .. I suppose I might push myself a little more to, ah, you know .. keep up .. ;-)

I'm already planning to sign up for next month's workouts. Expect before and after photos when the "after" happens!!

A general testifies before congress

The same thing that was said in 2004, 2005, 2006 and now 2007. Stay the course.

And makes no mention of:

What a "victory" would be.

What a "victory" would look like.

How a "victory" could be achieved.

Why any sort of "victory" appears to be out of reach, no matter how many Americans and innocent Iraqis are killed.

Why terrorism would be defeated with the obfuscated idea of a "win" in Iraq - which is admittedly unattainable, because the only "win" we can identify is to hold off all the factions fighting between themselves and the US.

As the war in Iraq happens, the number of terrorist attacks around the world continue to increase and the number of Americans and innocent Iraqis continue to be killed there - more this year than last.

I remember when right-wingers warned us that we had to stay and fight in Vietnam (we wanted their natural resources for pennies) because if Vietnam was not "won" by the US, Vietnam and all the surrounding countries would go "commie." Um, didn't happen.

Today we are warned that we have to stay in Iraq because if Iraq isn't "won" by the US, then Iraq and all the surrounding countries would go terrorist/Al Qaeda.

Really. Saudi Arabia - our "ally" just west of Iraq, would go Al Qaeda? Sure, the majority of foreign Iraqi fighters are coming from and financed by Saudi Arabians, and the majority of those who attacked the US Sept. 11, 2001 were Saudi Arabians ... but would the entire nation - a wealthy monarchy headed by King Abdullah Bin Abdul Aziz - "go" Al Qaeda? Think about it.

Would Iran, already a fundamentalist Muslim state, go Al Qaeda? I don't see that happening, even though president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is meshugenah.

Kuwait is too rich and conservative to go Al Qaeda. Check out the map for all the nations involved.

Jordan? Nope.

Syria already hosts terrorists of all stripes so it doesn't have to go Al Qaeda.

Turkey? Go Al Qaeda? Um, can't see it.

I have to wonder why we are we so afraid of terrorists to begin with.

If we are afraid of them, like any bully, they have already "won."

Their point is to scare us, to put us in a state of terror, and wow, have they been successful in the US, with the help of lots of politicians who have actually not done a whole lot to protect us from them.

After all, what are terrorists going to do? Turn us all into fundamentalist Muslims? Or have *us* go Al Qaeda? I seriously hope you are laughing.

Attack us? The US can handle any attack (well, if there are any soldiers left here to fight) - and thanks to the Bush administration's failure to secure our borders, the failed Department of Homeland Security and sadly incompetent FEMA (Federal Emergency Management Agency), we probably will have to deal with an attack one day.

I'm not saying there is nothing to be concerned about - but I'd prefer us to spend more time actually outwitting the terrorists than being afraid of them; spending more money protecting us from them than fighting a needless war.

Want to know how? Read Thinking Like A Terrorist by Mike German.

Unfortunately, President Bush confused the people who actually did attack us - mostly Saudi Arabian Al Qaeda members - with Iraqis. Not a single Iraqi attacked us Sept. 11, 2001, but he had the US military open fire on the Iraqis more than five years ago and today we are in a warring quagmire the US military is incapable of managing properly because it's a predominantly political problem that needs to be solved by the Iraqis themselves.

More, Osama bin Ladin's Al Qaeda wasn't even in Iraq until after we attacked and occupied Iraq. Interestingly, I doubt if Iraqis will ultimately fall for the political or religious lines of Al Qaeda - Iraqis just needed their help to fight their enemies.

I hope the souls killed in the attack on New York's Twin Towers, the Pentagon and United Flight 93 six years ago are resting in peace, ignoring how their President has sullied their memories, used them as political fodder to fulfill a personal or religious fantasy that has unnecessarily cost thousands' more American lives in Iraq and by extension Gulf victims of Katrina, and used the date of their deaths as a means to foster his political and - after he leaves office - financial coffers (according to Dead Certain, an interview with President Bush by Robert Draper).

Note to self: Ten-huh!

I attended my first session at a Seattle fitness boot camp - a combination of hard exercise and nutritional coaching held outdoors, rain or shine, Monday through Thursday mornings 7-8:15 a.m. for four weeks.

The coach definitely knows what she's doing and is appropriately supportive and helpful, which gives me great hope for some real progress over the next month. I've wanted to be part of an exercise program that keeps me accountable as well as receiving proper coaching and nutrition guidance, and sure enough - I found it just last week, in time for today's starting date.

After the physical assessment/evaluation this morning, I was surprised I'm in as good a shape as I am. I've taken some *serious* time off walking and working out as much as I had been enjoying earlier this year, and I'd much rather be writing than dashing about. But it's time to buckle down, restructure my schedule and re-establish my healthiest form.

If my experience this morning is any indication, I'm on my way!

Please remember this upbeat post as I start to grumble and mumble and curse and grouse as the end of the four weeks approaches .. ;-)

Blessings are counted

I'm feeling a little schizophrenic - my personal and professional lives are pretty fantastic these days, but my heart aches for our fighting men and women in Iraq, their families and the innocent Iraqis caught in the middle of the most bizarre, ghastly war there that has destabilized the world politically and fomented the cause of terrorism everywhere.

I saw President Bush's assessment and pronouncements, and all I will say is that Joseph Goebbels would be proud. It was astonishingly effective propaganda. I can't imagine the Democrats coming out fighting for the truth because those pictures and the cast were terrifically orchestrated.

So I'll just concentrate on my work.

I've been hired to write a feature film that I know will make everyone involved with it incredibly proud. The producer is terrific. Truly great producers are the salt of the earth - down to earth, honest, truthful, generous and open. They also know how to find the best professionals with whom to work, which makes for a mighty happy team. I'm very fortunate that we found one another.

So, I'm currently working on three feature film scripts, which is pure heaven for me. I'm fortunate that none of them bears the slightest resemblance to the other so there's no chance of becoming confused with any of them. More, each is in a much different state of completion, which makes for a pretty wonderful fall.

One is a comedy a kiss away from market, the next a comedy in the throes of a major second draft rewrite, and this script, which is a gripping drama in the development phase following the completion of the short film version - which we decided to table in favor of going directly to the feature length story.

Between these three feature projects, coaching, other writing commitments (two magazine columns coming up soon), catching the preview of my pal screenwriter Michael Brandt's new film 3:10 to Yuma tomorrow, and preparing a sensational seminar for Seattle actors with LA-based Bob Bledsoe Saturday, October 20, life is thriving.

Unfortunately, it means that I'll have to catch up on all the blog posts I want to write as soon as I have a little breathing space. Believe me, I'm teeming with ideas, thoughts and stuff to say. It also means I may severely limit my camera acting coaching practice sooner than I had planned, depending on how good a juggler I turn out to be!